on sunday josh made a comment that hit me quite pointedly between the eyes. he was talking about our salvation and said, “we didn’t earn this so there is no way we can blow this.”
God still blows me away. the truth that i wouldn’t even choose Him if He hadn’t first called me; if He hadn’t drawn me to Him. i never earned it!
a few months ago i was reading a book and the author was talking about effort verses earning. i had an AHA! moment. clarity in this ever elusive inner battle of legalism on silly things. God has in fact called us to effort but we will never be able to earn anything. it is so freeing.
just in the last week…actually up until monday night…i had been really wrestling with some stuff. sadness and pain and grief. and it was interesting because the Lord revealed to me that though they were real feelings and it was true pain, the magnitude to which they were being manifest was an attack. instantaneous relief.
previously in the week i found myself hyperventilating while crying which is not something i have ever done before. no amount of truth i spoke to myself made a different. as i read psalm 84 where the writer declare that God doesn’t withhold any good thing from those who seek Him felt more like a slap in the face than a consolation.
but it was in that moment of revelation from Him that i was reminded i can’t blow it. i can’t earn His love. i can’t earn my way into the things i want out of this life. i can’t earn good. it is all a gift.
as God’s own possession, we get to walk with our head held high. no matter what the circumstances, we are His. nothing can change that. nothing can steal us from Him. nothing can make us closer or further apart. what an amazing gift!
