i love how the Lord works. how He speaks. how He communicates and weaves the details and and and. it’s so sweet. i remember the first time i had a conversation with the Lord and was simply blown away. all i could think was “did that really just happen?” granted this was not an audible voice but it was as clear to me that they were not my thoughts as the color orange is found somewhere between red and yellow.
i have, for about 6 months now, been dealing with this ridiculous pain in my back. it is a herniated disc that is flaring up. usually you are supposed to stay active and it gets better. mine is not. and without going into the whole story for i fear you won’t care if i do, i feel like there is purpose in Him, the Great Physician, not healing me immediately. there are some lessons to be learning that for some reason i am not catching on too quickly.
that seems to be my problem sometimes. i don’t always catch on quickly or without doing it the hard way but whenever i catch on, it is stuck like glue! i think of all the things that i have finally caught on to and am blown away how they aren’t even a blip on the radar anymore. it’s sweet.
all that to say, i have this back pain and i know i am supposed to be learning so i am trying to listen. but there are days when i want to get back to working out. to living life. to being busy in different ways. i miss crossfit. i miss doing clean and jerks followed by wall balls and laps around buildings that make me feel equally desiring to throw up and die. and then having the satisfaction of finishing when i get done.
then i open and read “Jesus Calling” today and this is what it says…
Thank Me for the conditions that are requiring you to be still. do not spoil these quiet hours by wishing them away, waiting impatiently to be active again. some of the greatest works in My kingdom have been done from sick beds and prison cells. instead of resenting the limitation of a weakened body, search for My way in the midst of these very circumstances. limitations can be liberating when your strongest desire is living close to Me.
haha chills invaded my body and tears came to my eyes. He is so good to remind us of Him when we forget. when we even for a second forget that He is in fact God. the Great I AM. i am reminded in my time of being still of all the freedom and revelation and growth and blessings He has brought in the hardest year of my life. oh how He redeems and restores and loves to bless. LOVE IT!